Original Post
chapaguri

6-4-2023 11:54


@jhnxmth and @denverlanes both very real and realistic perspectives with good advice and insight.  Here are a few more thoughts:

1. Better luck if they are about to retire - I found it's a better relationship if the girl is planning or working towards retirement.  That avoids some of the issues @jhnxmth described but you need to make sure it's not a temporary break and she really is planning on quitting.  Your chances for a more "normal" relationship increase significantly if this is the case.

2. Don't confuse sex with romance and relationships.  @jhnxmth got it right again that they are offering a service and a fantasy.  Everyone gets confused but put it this way.  When you go to a restaurant do you flirt with the cook because the meal she just made was just amazing and you hope that she'll come home with you for a date and cook for you for free?  After cooking all day, do you think she wants to come home and cook some more?  Do you think to yourself "I'll take her out to hang out and then we can go back to my place and she can cook for me?"  Yeah, sounds ridiculous but think about it.

3. It's a job for them.  If you really want to have a relationship with them, imagine if they had a different job, would you still want to go out with them?  If so, great, go for it.  If you have something else in mind, you're probably setting yourself up for disappointment.

4. You can still hang out with them if they want to hang out with you.  Maybe draw some boundaries so no one is being taken advantage of and then see #3 above if you want to go further.

5. Remember relationships go both ways.  Do you want to be with her so you can get free service or do you really want to get to know her?  Is she being nice to you because she wants to know you better or is she just treating a good customer well?

Most people just want the 30min or 60min experience and move on.  If you're considering more, read all the posts so far closely and go in with realistic expectations.

@denverlanes reminded me of another scenario I ran into.  So adding to my list above:

6. Sometimes these girls are in this job temporarily out of desperation and they're just in to get the money they need and then get out and move on with their lives.  One clear signal would be a girl who uses fake pics.  Not all fake pics mean they're in it temporarily but pretty much most people who are in it temporarily will use fake pics.  Or they go work in a foreign country or they work far far away from any friends and family.  Again, just common sense.  Even after being pretty friendly with some of these girls, once they get out of the business, they want to cut all ties with their temporary working girl life - which could include you.  They don't want their future partners to know anything about their temporary job in the past.  Don't take it personally and don't get too clingy in this situation and respect their new life and don't try to contact them even if you have their contact info.

[ Last edited by  chapaguri at 5-4-2023 21:24 ]

UsernameTimeCreditsReason
jhnxmth 6-4-2023 12:12 Acceptance +1 Excellent advice, the chef comparison is perfect
Clickhoe 8-5-2023 01:16 Acceptance +2 Chef comparison is on point


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